Why Soul Mates Come And Go And Then…They Come Back

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Everyone feels different to me.

If I think of you, whether or not I have met you, you “feel” a certain way.  It is your energetic signature.

That’s how I know who is visiting me.

You may have been here, and not even known it.

Sometimes certain people show up, but only in spirit form.  Call it your soul or your higher self.  Maybe sometimes it is your primary guide, who shows themself as looking like you, so I will know who you are.

You cannot hide an energetic imprint.

And so it was the other night as I walked my deck, thinking of one man and being visited by another.

I had been texting with one guy, and he said something that I misunderstood.  In the moments before he clarified for me, I was having a chat with my mother and my team.

I asked a moral question and was pondering the answer when I got the text back.

I looked up and my team smiled at me, as if to say,”Silly girl, there is nothing to worry about.”

Spirit guides can be quite funny, and although my set is generally more serious than most, when it is very important they will laugh with me.

That’s how they let me know they have my back in the situation.

It’s how I know I am guided and on the right track, though I may wonder or doubt.

I was smiling ruefully to myself as the joke was on me.

Then I reached the end of the deck on which I was pacing and saw the Virgo.

The funny thing about the Virgo is that he seems to have taken up energetic residence just beyond the wall at the end of the house.

I feel him there all of time.  So strongly, that sometimes I think the actual live man might walk around the corner and give me the shock of my life.

I’ve been working on forgetting him because I haven’t seen the live man in some time nor have I heard from him recently.

I look at it like, if I was able to put my husband behind me and recover, then surely this one cannot be as difficult to do the same with?


Maybe not.

Nonetheless, as I paced the deck I saw him there, plain as day, and I heard him say,”This is what you are supposed to do while you are waiting for me.”

He meant, see the man you are texting.  It is part of the plan.

I was so shocked I almost tripped down the stairs.


One of you asked me last week, in a joking way, any tips on where or how we meet these people who are our air or will know our soul?

Why yes – thank you for asking!

You first feel into the energetic signature of everyone around you, and you ask yourself, are any of these people it?

Even if you know none are, I want you to feel into each person and evaluate them.

Why are they not it?

Each one will tell you who they are to you.  Notice what you like and what you dislike.

This could be the one, except…

Well if I could, I’d take the friendship with this one, the mind of that one, the kisses of the one over here.  I’d put them all together and…

Then look at the road ahead of you.

See yourself walking down a road in the middle of nowhere.  It stretches out endlessly behind you and in front of you.

Just feel into it.

Take a moment to feel into the past, the present and the future, and ask yourself where am I going and who will be there with me?

At some point, you may see someone take your hand.  How far down the road is that?  Does it feel like days, weeks, months, years?

If it doesn’t feel like time, perhaps instead you see the length of the road, and break it up into segments.  Where do the people blink onto the road?  Off?

Is it someone you know, or someone new?

Do you see some dropping your hand and disappearing from the picture?

How does it feel when they leave?

Are you heartbroken?

Do you just feel like you made a friend?

Did your duty?

Met up for a soul appointment and moved on down the road?

How many people show up on your path?

Does anyone walk with you until the end?

Call in your people who will be your air and see your soul.

Ask them to show up.

Ask them where they are right now.

Just start a conversation that says,”Hey, I know we haven’t met yet, but I was just wondering, what are you doing this afternoon?  Right now?”

Zero in on them.

If you reach out energetically, you can feel them, hear, see or sense what they are actually doing right now, in one form or the other.

Yes, you can.

By the way, some of them can hear you, too.

You don’t always have to do all the work of the seeking.

Sometimes you can just be receptive to being found.



I tell you this because most of you are empathic.  Intuitive.  Psychic.  All three, and more.  At the very least, you are thoughtful.

You can feel into it, if you try.

Then you have to keep working it, because it comes in bits and pieces over time, in flashes, fully downloaded, based upon your interactions with others sometimes it changes a little.  Or a lot.

Just pay attention, and kept asking for clarification, keep working on it with detachment.

Some days you will want to scream and pull your hair out, because as you meet people with whom you have contracts, they may test you.

They may come and go – and then come back again, sometimes more than once.

They may fight it, be compelled by it, act like rubber bands and snap you right on the wrist to smart for a while at the outrageous sting.

You can be shouting after them,”Hey!  What the hell?!” as they spray gravel in your face as they peel out so quickly.

Those are the ones who usually come back, after some thinking or wound licking or contemplation or…who knows what they do!

You will know when the important moments come.

There are times when you must speak your part, no matter how the words and feelings get stuck in your throat.

This demands bravery, the likes of which you have never had to have before.

The things you must be brave about vary from person to person, but these people come to test you, to open your mind or heart with a pry bar if it has been shut, to make you speak if you have been shy and silent.

Yes, you will be forced to use your words, to say it aloud…lest you lose your chance.

Whatever is the hardest thing in the world for you to do, whatever comes most unnaturally, is likely to show up in the form of that beautiful man or woman – and before that one person, that one soul, you can do it.

You must, or you’ve missed your chance.  You may get another, because you need it.  That’s why sometimes they come and they go, and then they come back.

They are actually there to help you with that part of your life – the opening up, the bravery in action.  That is part of – or maybe the whole of – your soul contract with them.

So many friends are divorcing now, or have decided to leave their families for work like my husband did, or are looking closely at their wives or girlfriends and either clinging out of fear or completely stepping out and away.  Relationships are in play in a huge way right now, that’s for sure!

Sometimes hearing about it – heck, just living it – feels like we walked into one big mystery novel.

When it feels like you are in a storybook, that is surely the activation of all the souls who are the characters in the novel that is your life story.

I went on a date with a man who looked exactly like my last husband.  Well, slightly less handsome.  Also slightly less intelligent.  But very kind and talented and successful.  Still, the beginning with him and the things he brought up were SO much like dating was with my husband twenty-some years ago, that it felt like stepping back in time.

That was weird.

My sons had gone to my dad’s house while I went to dinner on this first date, and my son happened to be texting with his dad and mentioned he was going to grandpa’s “for the night.”

The next day, someone asked me how my date went.  Without knowing about the texting, I commented how I had to race back to my dad’s by 10pm so I could get the kids home and in bed.  I swear I heard an audible sigh on the other end of the line.

My last husband joked with me that it was a good thing I was dating an electrician, since the electrical in my house is all messed up.  I joked back that maybe I should date all the trades, because the roof has been leaking, the plumbing is messed up, and the HVAC has been difficult this year.

Things never went anywhere with the electrician, but someone else did come back.  He is the oldest running character in this part of my novel, and I had given up on him completely.

He is the one that I kept saying I didn’t have as much animation with and yet…I run into him all of the time.  I just felt like “we were supposed to” get to know each other.  I was a bit miffed when he went away the first time, because I felt like we were supposed to connect, but that was before I understood about the coming and going, the rubber band effect.

Now I have seen it so many times I just roll my eyes when they go.

I look down the road and I can see them up ahead.

What do you see on your road?


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  1. Hey, thanks for writing this. For me, reading this came at the right time and the right place. I feel clarification on some similar things I am going through. So, thanks again.

  2. I read this post today and I almost cried. I have not heard from my love for a year. I have done all I can to find peace and accept that we had our time and it is over. I ask how it is I can move forward any other time something ends, but this is different. I wonder if he thinks of me. He must because our love was so real. I want to believe we read things or hear things when we need to and it is not a coincidence, but a meagre. That he will return, but I need to continue to live in the mean time.

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