Perspective Taking When Kindler and Gentler Gets You a Smack In The Mouth

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The term perspective taking is thrown around wildly in the realm of autism (and I am sure, many other things).   Yes, neurotypical people will mostly find that if given a short passage to read, they can choose the most correct answer from a multiple choice A,B,C or D.  Autism can bring a different perspective.  That person may say none make sense, more than one makes sense, or just get confused by having to make a choice, because the concept of multiple choice doesn’t really compute.

Imagine walking through the world as someone who thinks and processes completely differently from most of the people around them.

This is what psychics do.

Commonly we will tell you things that have no basis in logic.

They are still true, however.

I most notice this discrepancy when I am communicating with other psychics or intuitives.

We see the same situation and have completely different perspectives on it.  We come at it from different viewpoints, clairs, and through our own personal lens of experience and knowledge.

We almost always arrive at the same conclusion, but the discovery is greater when our forces are combined.

“Oh!” we’ll say.  “I never thought of it that way.  So that really means…”

The combination of this kind of energy is greater than the sum of its parts.  Whenever synergy happens, I can almost see the angels nodding their heads and smiling.

Put any two people together and no matter how sympatico they are, eventually they will run out of things to talk about or get on each other’s nerves.

If they start off with similar experiences and backgrounds, discord will come more quickly because they tend to devolve into arguments over subtleties more quickly.  There is less “getting to know you” because in a sense, they already do.  There is less to be fascinated about.  Less to learn.

And so it was this week as I was having a conversation with someone who I already knew was on a downhill climb from my mountain.

I knew we were devolving because I started to feel our conversations were going in circles.  Worse, I felt they were contradicting themselves.  The more I tried to see it their way, the less I could.

I learned the expression “both are true”, and its meaning, from Robert Ohotto.  When two things which seem to contradict each other exist at the same time, we say that both are true.  It provides a flexible mindset and energetic system that is open to more than black or white, good or evil.

The funniest part of this process is that we all carry judgments because we each have our own upbringing, experiences, energy fields and so on.  We are me, and me sees the world unlike anyone else does.

I wonder sometimes, especially in the midst of a Mercury Retrograde as we are right now, how The Trickster shows up.  The Trickster can show up through other people.  The psychic who tells you something that you want to hear, because The Trickster has their ear.  The new lover who seems like The One, because The Trickster brought him or her to you to show that obsessing on Relationship isn’t helpful.  The oracle cards that say yes, this is the job for you.  The coach who encourages you to quit your day job.  All visits from The Trickster.

I knew I was having a visit from The Trickster because of how upset I got trying to figure out what this person was telling me to do.  Instead of releasing my current situation to the cosmic field, surrendering, staying focused on my Present rather than projecting into the future, and looking for the joy while taking care of myself, I was spending my energy wondering what they meant by that and how two opposite things could be true at the same time.

You know The Trickster is in the house when you have taken someone else’s advice rather than your own, and you feel certain they have delivered an epiphany.  Ah, breakthrough! you think to yourself.  Then, when you go to take action on that advice, you find out they were wrong.  This is especially obvious when you are geared up to end a relationship or have a big talk with someone but find when you arrive that there is absolutely no energy around taking that step.  Things go well and there is just no need.

Why then, the buildup?

Probably to show you that looking outside yourself isn’t the best choice.  Lending your ear to someone else can be helpful insofar as it allows you do a little perspective taking, but ultimately you are the master of your own energy and your choices fuel your world.

I should have known things were going this way when I found myself in resistance.  When I felt how upset I was getting.  “This feels wrong” was coming through loud and clear.  But a little part of me said,”Maybe it’s you who has the wrong perspective.  Just keep working on it and maybe you’ll have a breakthrough.  Maybe they are right and you just have a block around this.”

Yesterday I read a blog post from an intuitive who said she thought all healers were immune from sicknesss, until she had a bout of illness that landed her on her butt for several weeks.  From my perspective, I just shook my head because I can clearly see that the notion that any person can avoid illness or lessons through illness is just well, stupid.  I do remember the day the concept occurred to me though – I was doing too much and the Universe landed me on my butt until I realized I couldn’t just keep going like the Energizer Bunny.  So no matter how much we think we know, there are always a million more concepts to understand and lessons to learn.

Part of me knew that I wanted to understand how I could be a kinder, gentler version of myself, so that when I did intuitive work, there was a better chance it would be heard and received.

I did learn how to do it, because I received a harsh judgment from a “kindler, gentler” type.  I was shouted at.  I felt what it was like on the receiving end of really wanting an answer and getting it from another person – in Trickster version.  There are no shortcuts, folks.  We may believe we are seeking help because we can’t see the forest for the trees, so we look to others for a hint or a clue, but ultimately everything comes from within.  We can get direction, but if we stay too long at the party we will be booted out to find our strength and our own answers.

There is no right or wrong.  But there is right or wrong, for you.  Both are true.

Sometimes you have to get that old reflective mirror out and see the people who come in and out of your life as “the helpful people corner”, as in feng shui.

They will reflect back to you what you most need to know about yourself.  They will show you who you really are.  Like it or lump it!

This experience has taught me that I remain primarily a truth teller.  I enjoy connecting people to each other and to solutions.  I’m a researcher.  Things just come to me, for other people.  I am a bottom-liner.  I don’t coddle or babysit, yet I can show kindness and compassion in my own way, probably more today than yesterday.  I always knew who I was, but I had to go through this lesson to see it more clearly.  I had to feel it to understand it, not just intellectualize it.  Basically, it gave me the clarity to take my next steps forward in service to you all and to myself.

Doubt can confuse us sometimes, but ultimately we are our own worst enemy, mother, and best friend.

At core, you know why you agreed to come here and what you agreed to do for yourself and others, and what your delivery system is.

There are many different versions of “right.”  We can completely disagree yet still be right for ourselves, at this moment in time, with what we know so far.  We can graciously agree that the other person is right, too – but their way is not the only way, and may not be the way for us.  They are still whole and perfect, just as they are, in all of their imperfection, just like we are.  They may have a completely different perspective.

We can honor each other.

We can say thank you for the gift.

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  1. *clapping hands* Bravo! <3 <3 <3. and keep on keepin' on, as harsh as this planet can be sometimes, you got this! and I think I do too (finally!). Take care and many, many, many blessings. <3

  2. Both may be true but usually only one works for you.

  3. “Both may be true” ..WHY am I saying this to myself in a Yoda voice?! Good post very thought provoking.

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