Archives for April 2014

Connecting To Loved Ones Who Have Died

How Do You Connect To A Loved One Who Has Died? is the article that brings most people to A Clear Sign.  Considering how many opportunities I’ve had for mediumship lately, how many of my relatives have been coming around, and some questions I had this week from an old friend whose mother has recently crossed over, let’s revisit the subject of what happens when we die and how can those of us still here get in touch?


I was standing in my boys’ closet looking at the disasterous mess of clothes strewn about.  It was late at night and I’ve been fighting off a chest cold for a couple of months so I’m tired and I let out a big sigh.

Suddenly I heard in my head,”Ishkabibble.”

I saw an image of my mother and her sister, Ida, both of whom are dead.

I haven’t thought of that word in a thousand years, and I’d forgotten what it meant.  I looked it up and it was perfect for the situation:

It’s a slang term from 1913 which means,”I should worry!” which actually translates to,”Don’t worry!” or,”Who cares?”  It sounds like Yiddish, which would have been appropriate to both women, but actually it isn’t.  Nonetheless, clearly they were with me in the closet telling me to get over it already.

It gave me a good laugh and I certainly felt better knowing they were there telling me I should take care of myself and not worry about little messes or small inconveniences of life.  You know I can get overly serious when I’m unwell and really, what could it hurt if I had a reminder from those who used to take care of me that I was doing a good enough job taking care of my boys?

My Mother Comes Around

I knew my mother was in the neighborhood because a couple of weeks ago my youngest son, who calls me “Mom” not “Julie” found the singing birthday card my husband got me in March.  He walked right up to me, opened it up, and sang along.  Using a voice that was not his usual tone, he sang,”Happy birthday, dear Julie, happy birthday to you.”  I knew right away it was a belated happy birthday song from my Mom because he sounded exactly like her, intonation and all.

Uncle Joe

Every once in a while when I am messaging with someone or talking with them on the phone, their relatives will take the opportunity to give them a shout out.  Open vessel, found?  Any port in a storm?

It’s a little disconcerting when you are taking a break at work or otherwise just minding your own business and Spirit takes the opportunity to come on through.  It’s moments like those when I feel like the Long Island Medium, without the lip biting.

Still, they aren’t rude and they don’t throw me off and I don’t usually get a feeling of chills or really, anything.  It’s like someone beeped in on call waiting except it just happens in my head.

One particular friend of mine has a grandpa who likes to pop in unannounced on a regular basis.  I always ask my friend if he was just thinking of him, wishing he was still around to talk with, and inevitably he says yes.

The part that I find comical and synchronistic is that one day he posted a photo of himself with his grandpa and I almost fell over.  I wanted to ask him if it was a joke, but of course, it couldn’t have been.

His grandpa looks EXACTLY like my Uncle Joe.

The funny part of this is that back when I was doing intuitive readings regularly, I would often see my own family members in someone’s reading.  I remember I saw my Uncle Joe when I did the first reading for my friend.  Or I thought I saw my Uncle Joe.  I knew this was his grandfather, because of the age, and I saw him sitting in the stands at Santa Anita, the horse track in California.  My friend grew up in Los Angeles and my Uncle Joe was a bookie back in the day.

Trying to explain to someone who exactly is visiting them when you see your own uncle is kind of hard, especially when they don’t give a name.  “Well, he’s short and he has white or gray hair and a moustache and he’s wearing old man pants with a belt…”

Why Don’t People Come Through Immediately After They’ve Died?

Unlike last week when I reported that my old childhood “boyfriend” came through the day after his funeral, most of the time people do have a period of assimilation, commonly known as the Life Review, after they die.  Depending upon what their mission was this lifetime, where they are in their spiritual evolution, and some other factors, it seems like some spirits take more time than others to process what they’ve been through.  It also seems like some have “jobs” on the other side and they get busy doing them, not always having or making the “time” (time being relative, it doesn’t work like it does here) to immediately come visit those they’ve left behind in grief.

Part of it may be your perception, since you don’t always know what you’re looking for as a “sign” or an “answer” from them.  Even I miss them sometimes, and I am totally on the alert for them.

Part of it is that you don’t “believe it when you see or hear it” because you may perceive that a passing thought in your head is just wishful thinking, not a message you are receiving.  Trust me, we are all big receivers, like radios.  Think about it, how else are they going to deliver a response or a message that they are right there beside you?  Yes, they can move physical stuff around or get all up in your electronics if they have to, but before they ever do that there 1,001 signs and messages that you missed.

That thought that popped into your head when you were thinking of something else?  That’s them.  That is usually the easiest way to get through to you, by delivering a message that sounds like the voice you use when you are “thinking.”

If you aren’t good at “hearing” or discernment, they will send you visual images.  They will just “pop” into your head, like a dream does, except you are awake.

Finally, if you miss the thoughts they inserted into your day or the images that popped into your mind, if you’ve discounted the dimes showing up, the book falling off the shelf, or “your song” coming on the radio as “just a coincidence” or “wishful thinking”, sometimes they will drop in on your dreams.

If you really want to connect to a loved one who has died, read the article and just be open (stay alert) to however they are going to help you out and show up.

How Do I Know My Loved One Is OK?

My friend whose mother died recently was asking me the obvious question everyone seems to want to know,”How do I know that she is OK?”  Sometimes people are sick here or really suffered or had an unexpected or tragic end, and we just want to know they are at peace and not “just buried in a hole in the ground.”  We want to know that they live on, in spirit, and that they are well.

Once we die, we really do shuffle off this mortal coil.  The physical bodies we had?  Gone.  That’s what’s in the ground, if we’ve buried it, and our physical and mental problems stay there.

We return to our essence, our spirit, our basic energy.

We retain all knowledge and lessons of this lifetime and regain that of all other lifetimes.  It is reintegrated.

What we are doing here is having fun, challenges and learning lessons.  Everything that we do is like being in a vast play on a stage of our creation.

When we die, we might not be exalted or all-knowing but we aren’t limited like we are here to what is right in front of our faces.  Those of us here, when ready, can open our hearts and minds up to what is generally unseen by most.  When we do, we know that what we see is not all that we get.  There is far more going on right in front of your face that you may ever have dreamed of perceiving, even if you are very in tune and perceptive.  Some people, like my friend, are meant to see it someday when they are ready, and perhaps her mother may be the opening she needs to get started.

The point is, they are fine, it’s we who are left struggling (if we do!).  Love crosses all boundaries, and if we are truly in need, our loved ones will come.