Archives for July 2011

The Secret Behind Emotional Strength

Today’s Thursday Post is written by M.Farouk Radwan, the founder of http://www.2knowmyself.com
Farouk is a favorite of mine for insightful and inspirational short posts and he has written an adjunct article to the issues I have been writing about for the past two weeks.
The secret behind emotional strength
For years I have been wondering why some people are emotionally strong and why others are weak.
I was also wondering why some people get over painful losses quickly and why do others remain broken.
For example one person could completely lose hope when he loses his job while another one could not become affected at all when the same thing happens to him.
What’s the secret behind this emotional strength?
The secret behind emotional strength
After studying the behavior and personality of thousands of people and after researching that topic for years I came up with some conclusions that can help us answer these questions, here they are:
·         Emotional attachment makes you weak:  The more attached you are to what you have the more vulnerable you will feel whenever you are threatened to lose it. A man who is extremely attached to the high salary he earns will not be able to sleep at night if his company announced that they will downsize.
·         Emotional attachment results from helplessness: If the man in the previous example was 100% sure that he can find another job if he lost his first one he might not feel bad at all even if he lost his job. On the other hand if the man was really helpless then he will become much more attached to his job and so he will become weaker.
·         Emotional attachment and lack of alternatives: If you had 10 dollars in your pocket and you lost them you might not feel bad if you had 100 dollars in your other pocket but if the only amount you had was these 10 dollars then certainly you will feel horrible if you lost them. If you don’t have other alternatives then you will become more emotionally attached to what you have. This brings us to a very important point, the more skilled you are the less attached you will be to what you have because in such a case your faith in your skill will make you feel confident that you can get whatever you lost once again.
·         Acceptance and weakness: I know what might have to come to your mind while reading this post. Some things can’t be replaced! How can you replace a beloved parent or a lost limb? Here is where acceptance comes into play. People who learn how to accept life events become much more powerful than those who don’t. People who can’t accept changes become so much attached to the past that they never manage to move on.
So how can you be powerful?
Based on the previous facts here is what you should do in order to be powerful:
1)      Increase your skills as much as you can until you trust your ability to bring back whatever you are going to lose
2)      Never become dependent on one thing to feel happy or confident
3)      Never become attached to the past else you will always remain unhappy
4)      Learn how to accept new events
Please post your comment to this article for Farouk’s response below. You can also visit him at:Farouk Radwan
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