Talking To Your Higher Self

seeker rumi

I had this idea that I needed to get closer to my spiritual team.

I don’t normally meditate, per se, but I do walk around “living inside my head” all the time, which can be a form of meditation.

It’s not so much like being lost in my imagination as it is being in constant contact with my team.

Sometimes I need to ground myself back into reality to mop the floors, do the laundry, and pay bills.

I usually have music playing in my ears for those tasks, except for bill paying.

If I am at work or doing anything related to numbers or reading, I must have complete silence.

My attention is so focused that I can only do one thing at a time, unless it is mechanical like the swish of the mop back and forth or the filling of the bucket with hot water.

My son says I don’t pay attention, and he asks me why I can’t focus on him, why it takes me so long to respond sometimes.

I tell him I was lost in thought on another matter, but my memory stored what he said and it just took me a few seconds to process.

“Mom, what did I just say?” occasionally gets an answer with about half of the facts in it.

But most of the time when he is talking, I am present.

Lately we have a lot to talk about.  He likes the Pop Rocks channel on Sirius XM, and I have a story behind almost every song since it’s the 90s and 2k era.  Normally I listen to Lithium, which is 90s alternative and grunge, or all of the 70s stations.  I have everything from the 70s covered from Led Zeppelin to Gordon Lightfoot, and he is well-educated enough to have moved on.

I had a parenting moment of joy when we saw Thor: Ragnarok and at the opening scene my nine-year old turned to me and said excitedly,”That’s Led Zeppelin.”

My work here is done.

I use music to dance to on my porch, for health reasons both of the physical and mental kind.

Do not play anything when I am writing, because it will cause me to lose all concentration and focus.

Some people would die without their music to write to.

Once in a while other entities make themselves known while I am bopping around trying to bring myself back to center.

I love it when Prince shows up because he is always straight to the point and he makes music suggestions.  Usually his own.  That is so Prince.

In the lyrics I always find the exact answer to the question I’d been asking in my head.

So it was no surprise when one day my friend Lori popped in with a message asking how I was and suggested “asking for a song through the radio” as a possible solution.

Exactly what I have been doing my whole life.

Mentoring From A Tarot Grandmaster

I have been having spiritual counseling or mentoring sessions with the Tarot Grandmaster.

And by the way, I highly, highly recommend her if you want to speak to a super smart, extraordinarily intuitive, irreverent (self-proclaimed) Tarot reader who is so much more than someone who reads Tarot. If you want a referral, let me know.

She gives me homework after our sessions and BOY did the homework cause me to laser focus and almost spin out.

Part of me was busy at my day job and preparing the family for the holidays, and the other part was running in the background figuring out the answers to my homework.

It took me back to childhood.  It had me doing some surprise intuitive work for others.  It had me hearing from the men.

The other thing it did was force me to get real and get focused, even though I didn’t plan to do so in a conscious way, Life kept bringing me ideas, challenges and opportunities.

When I started to feel like I was going too far into Overwhelm from Life Being Too Much, I went into picture mode.

That means that instead of writing someone a letter and burning it, I would zoom in on their picture and talk to them for as long as I needed to.

Until I felt complete.

This saves me hours with a therapist and saves my friends from having to listen to me babble on at length, often about the same old problems I’ve been working on forever.

I told the Tarot Grandmaster about my penchant for doing this weird behavior, and she said it was my higher self talking to their higher self.

Energy Classifications – Who Are You Communicating With?

The higher self is for purposes of this discussion, an aspect of the soul.  The part of you that is More You or Beyond You as the person you know who walks around this planet.

In essence it knows things you don’t, and working on blending or merging or accessing the higher self is what it turns out I have been reaching for or attempting, without exactly being aware of it.

Years ago in a reading I met with my friend Mary’s soul (I thought at the time, probably really it was the higher self but I am splitting hairs, all is part of the other) instead of her spirit guides and angels, which is what I was consciously asking for.

I thought this was remarkable and pretty darn cool.

It reminded me of when I was first asked if I could do mediumship and I said,”I don’t know but let’s find out!” and as it turned out, mediumship (connecting to the energy of a person who has died) is a lot like connecting to the higher self – sometimes.

Once in a mediumship reading I connected with an energy that just felt different.  It was extremely clear, so clear that it was like having a conversation with you.

I asked it why it felt different and it explained that the person I was trying to access had already incarnated and so I was speaking to its higher self, who was watching that aspect live its new life.  It was also watching all of the other lives it had spawned (for lack of a better term).

When I first moved into this house I was home sick from work and felt a HUGE energy enter my room.  It felt powerful in a raw power kind of way.  I thought it was another live person and it scared the bejesus out of me until I had the thought pop in, I wonder if that was an angel?

This was way before I started getting into my intuitive work so thinking of angels was not a normal event for me at that time.

Each energy feels different, and each type of energy classification feels different.

I might just always look to Spirit and say “my Team” when addressing them, but I usually don’t go looking for who is present and who is answering me.

What I do notice is that information comes in through different ways.  A song on the radio, a fully formed thought that pops into my head as “the answer”, an image in my mind’s eye, a sentence heard inside my head.  I always assumed that these were different energies, or entities if you will, different members of my team or different energies in Spirit that were popping in to give me advice or guidance or answers.

But as it’s become clearer that I am self-educating in Tarot, Reiki, Astrology and all forms of intuition, for an eventual purpose, to get back into helping and reading for others in some form, suddenly my instructions changed.

They said you need to get into closer contact with your team.

I asked how, and they told me to see the Tarot Grandmaster,

Then one day I was irritated with The Virgo and I looked up to talk to his higher self (although I usually just call it his soul, but higher self actually makes more sense).

The Virgo’s higher self always seems present any time I ask, and sometimes he comes to see me.  Like Mary, this is the only other person’s higher self that I have been conscious of communicating with except in mediumship experiences.

The Virgo wasn’t alone, he had my higher self with him.  I could see his face plain as day, the same face he has in walking life, but I couldn’t see her face.  They spoke to me with crystal clarity, laughed, reassured me about what was bothering me, and were on their way, off together into the ether.

I had been getting the message,”Hey Julie, how come you have never made a practice of connecting to your OWN higher self?”

It was a duh moment.  Why not, indeed?

I had a moment years ago when I was getting close to one of my transit spirit guides, and as I visualized him leaning in to whisper in my ear I freaked out and pulled back my energy.

Ever since then, I have realized that I am comfortable but any time I ask to “see” my team they send the information in another way instead.

I wondered if I worked on reaching out to my higher self, would I connect with “her” or was she really an aspect I heard from all the time but had just not identified?

Connecting To My Higher Self

It was on my list to talk to the Tarot Grandmaster about forming a connection with my higher self.

She brought it up first.

I told her about the experience of not seeing my face and she said if his face was the same, why wasn’t my higher self’s face my own face?

We had been talking about me being in hiding and she asked me to work with my higher self on why we were hiding.  Why didn’t I see a face?

She looked at me and said that my higher self said the equivalent of “I’ll show you my face when I am good and ready and you have done your work and are ready.”

It was nicely worded but pretty sassy and boundaried.

On my drive home it occurred to me that lately I have found myself speaking out quite definitely, strongly, and powerfully.  It is so different from my normal persona that two people commented on how strident I was, firm, opinionated, and certain of my own truth, without impinging on anyone else’s own truth.  One said that in the four years he knew me he had never seen that side of me.

It struck me like a lightning bolt that this could be my higher self integrating with me, bringing that aspect of myself through for me.

Maybe you are given directions: Connect to your Higher Self.  Then just by consulting your higher self in a casual way, which you have always directed at your spirit guides, “Hey higher self, would you like to weigh in here?  What do you think?” maybe it just begins to happen.  Like magic.

I looked up through the windshield and saw her confirm that I was right, I had gotten it.  She was indeed here, that was her.

I thought how great that was.  Pause for a moment and imagine the one aspect of yourself that you like the very most, the one that feels the best to you, finally connecting with you and coming through you.

You’ve made the contact, the connection.

Surely it was always there but now you are integrating it.

There’s no better feeling in the world.